However idyllic we attempt to make things for our kids this year, there is one thing that seems to creep in at every point with Christmas. I think it is something that is inherent in the world we live in, but gets emphasised and exaggerated at Christmas: Buying stuff.
In the western world that we
live in, and for all those of you who are subscribers to this ezine, you have a degree of affluence. There are many, many people in the world a lot less affluent than you; both in your home country and more so around the world. We all tend to buy stuff. Buying stuff is soooooo easy these days too. We have a lot of influences telling us to buy stuff. For me, I have to deal with my own incessant desire to own more technology, more hypnosis books and more running gear…. But then the kids look at
the telly and start pointing to stuff they want too, or that other kids have, or things they see in shop windows and on billboards. Just wanting to buy stuff is one thing, but the ability to buy stuff at will, having that level of affluence that we all have, can create some problems.
Many people mistakenly believe affluence makes them feel good. Buying and owning stuff gets equated with
self-worth. Ok, so we might not all be multi billionaires, but you are able to buy stuff you want, live where you choose, own stuff that you want. For many of us, it makes us feel like we have or are achieving something, or that we are somehow worthy.
Then why does owning more stuff, buying more stuff still leave us wanting more? Or perhaps leaving us feel dissatisfied? The initial joy of
buying more stuff diminishes or we get bored. Perhaps it even leads to buying more stuff. Yet is is only a temporary satisfaction.
Aren’t we supposed to feel good if we buy more stuff? Isn’t affluence supposed to make life easier? For some maybe it does in some ways. But it does not do any good if we mistake affluence for self-worth. Owning loads of stuff, or making plenty of money does not
make anxiety or depression go away. For some, it can make mental health worse.
Those of you who are disputing that you are affluent, may still wish to be so, or aspire to be so. Yet those with more modest lives may have far less to concern themselves with beyond making ends meet, as unpleasant as that may be. Very often, those who live highly affluent lives on a grand scale can very often
find that any neurotic behaviour creates emotional, social and financial debacles, worthy of headlines in glossy magazines.
If you are addicted to affluence (or the appearance of affluence) or aspire to be affluent so much so that it distracts you from all the other beauty and joy to be found in life, know that affluence does not necessarily cure the anxiety of insignificance. It does not
provide you with a life purpose. It does not satisfy a neurotic need, which, by definition, is a need that can never be satisfied. In short, affluence does not equate to self-worth.
This festive season, if you are affluent (or a wannabe affluent), be aware of whether your riches (or desired riches) are liberating or enslaving you and your life:
Are you being problematically distracted by your ability to get (or consume) whatever you want or are you in control, getting what you truly want or need?
Are you letting your affluence (or desire for it) destroy your ability to find a purpose in life, or are you using your affluence to better your life and
the lives of others?
Is your affluence or desire for it leading you into perilous pastimes, or are you willing and able to tame those impulses?
Are your children being taught good values or are they adversely affected by their easy access to money and the
stuff it can buy?
